The infant management concepts presented in this book have found favor with over two million parents and twice as many contented babies. On Becoming Babywise brings hope to the tired and bewildered parents looking for an alternative to sleepless nights and fussy babies. The Babywise Parent Directed Feeding concept has enough structure to bring security and order to your baby's world, yet enough flexibility to give mom freedom to respond to any need at any time. It teaches parents how to lovingly guide their baby's day rather than be guided or enslaved to the infant's unknown needs.
The information contained within On Becoming Babywise is loaded with success. Comprehensive breast-feeding follow-up surveys spanning three countries, of mothers using the PDF method verify that as a result of the PDF concepts, 88% breast-feed, compared to the national average of only 54% (from the National Center for Health Statistics). Of these breast-feeding mothers, 80% of them breast-feed exclusively without a formula complement. And while 70% of our mothers are still breast-feeding after six months, the national average encourage to follow demand feeding without any guidelines is only 20%. The mean average time of breast-feeding for PDF moms is 33 1/2 weeks, well above the national average. Over 50% of PDF mothers extend their breast-feeding toward and well into the first year.
Added to these statistics is another critical factor. The average breast-fed PDF baby sleeps continuously through night seven to eight hours between weeks seven and nine. Healthy sleep in infants is analogous to healthy growth and development. Find out for yourself why a world of parents and pediatricians utilize the concepts found in On Becoming Babywise.
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Product Details
Author:
Gary Ezzo
Paperback:
252 pages
Publisher:
Parent-Wise Solutions, Inc.
Publication Date:
2006-09
Language:
English
ISBN:
1932740082
Product Length:
8.22 inches
Product Width:
5.26 inches
Product Height:
0.76 inches
Product Weight:
0.58 pounds
Package Length:
8.2 inches
Package Width:
5.1 inches
Package Height:
0.9 inches
Package Weight:
0.6 pounds
Average Customer Rating:
based on 640 reviews
Customer Reviews
Average Customer Review: ( 640 customer reviews )
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews
482 of 553 found the following review helpful:
Didn't work for us Sep 18, 2007
By Momof3! I would like to respond to the reviewers that suggest those of us who disliked babywise didn't read it, or didn't apply its principles properly. I read, re-read and highlighted the book after a friend of mine recommended it. And for a solid month I faithfully attempted to place my newborn on the babywise schedule, but it just did not work for my son. For example, my son often awoke earlier from his nap than the schedule would allow. Sometimes he would wake crying, sometimes happy. If he was crying, I would allow him to cry because the book suggests if your baby awakes crying he did not get enough sleep. But, he never fell back asleep. So then I would feed him only to find he was starving. But how was I to know he was hungry...babwise never once discusses reading your baby's cues, only "mom, not baby, decides when nap begins, and mom, not baby, decides when nap ends." If he woke happy, then I really was in a bind. He would play awake in his crib (even if I didn't go to him) so now he was having activity before eating (a babywise no-no). But if I fed him, he would be fed before 2 ½ hours (another babywise no-no). I tried putting him to bed for naps earlier, because the book states that if your child awakes early he probably was overtired and needed less activity, but my son would still awake after 45-60 minutes. I was constantly stressed out.
After one month on babywise, my son was still not back to his birth weight. I quit using the system and my son started rapidly gaining weight. We both became happier. I can't say I disagree with the overall concepts of the book...promoting full feedings instead of snacking, frequent daytime feedings to help baby distinguish day from night, teaching a baby to fall asleep on his/her own, and the importance of sleep to both a baby and his/her parents. I just disagree with the presentation. Babywise assumes all babies fit into its schedule, and in truth, they just don't.
This is obviously a very controversial book. I do not think you have to have an MD/PhD after your name to know something about raising a baby, but the fact that the author has absolutely no medical/childcare background concerns me, especially when the concepts are so radically different from what most pediatricians/child psychologists recommend. Just because something works (i.e. gets you baby to sleep through the night), doesn't make it the best thing for your child.
As a side note, I never co-slept or wore my baby in a sling all day long (though I feel if this works for you and your baby then great...this just isn't my style of parenting). I definitely feel babies need parental guidance, but I think parents must take their baby's temperaments into account. Once I started reading other books, I learned how to better read my babies cues, and I no longer had to fight him to sleep, eat or stay awake. I used a combination of several other books (No Cry Sleep Solution, Sleep Lady's Gentle Guide and Baby Whisperer) and am happy to report I have a 9 month old who sleeps 11 hours per night and takes 2 good naps a day...oh and has been sleeping 10 hrs/night since 3 months of age. He is an absolute joy and everywhere I take him people comment on how happy and content he is...in church, restaurants and shopping. It can be done without babywise!
81 of 92 found the following review helpful:
Combined with commen sense, this is an amazing book! May 02, 2008
By Catherine Burns I think some of the people who don't like this book have missed the point! The authors take pains to say that Parent Directed Feeding (PDF) should ONLY be used as a guideline.... they say that if your baby is hungry, feed them. They don't advocate that babies are left to "cry it out" although they do say there is no harm letting them cry for 10/15 minutes to see if they will re-settle (I lasted about 5 minutes!) I devoured this book as a first time Mum, with no idea of how to start scheduling my little one. I used their method of Eat-Activity-Sleep as a guideline and it totally transformed my life. However, I didn't stress if we missed the odd nap or fed a little earlier or later. If you use this method as a framework to base your own instinct on, then you can get fabulous results. Our girl still wakes once in the night, but she's only 4 months old and that's fine by me! She is a totally happy little soul and I'm convinved that much of that has to do with the confidence that this book gave me!
147 of 173 found the following review helpful:
Somewhat Helpful But Too Controlling Jun 06, 2008
By Susan B. Kohanek
"cook123"
I am a first-time mom of a now 6 month old baby, and I have read SEVERAL books including the No-Cry Sleep Solution, Baby Wise, The Happiest Baby on the Block, a wonderful little book called N.A.P.S., and parts of Ferber's book. Baby Wise was recommended to me by 3 very good friends. I read the book before my child was born and was ready to put him on a schedule at 3 weeks of age. That was my first mistake. I have come to realize over the past few months that it's easy to say that every baby is different, but the truth of the matter is that no one program could possibly work for every child. If it could, then there wouldn't be so many books and theories out there.
Baby Wise did not work for me. And yet without it, my son slept through the night at 2 months of age. I think I'm just lucky. I don't believe it's necessarily because of anything special that my husband and I did. I do think it might have had something to do with The Happiest Baby on the Block because that book led us to swaddle our baby which lengthened his nighttime sleep and naps dramatically. And yet we dropped swaddling at night at 2 months of age.
Here's my main issue with Baby Wise. It states ideas like "Mom, not baby, decides when the nap begins and when the nap ends." There's also a similar statement about Mom deciding how much comes out of the bottle, not the baby. At the time I didn't think much of it. Now when I think about those statements, it makes it sound like a power struggle between a parent and a baby. An infant does not have an agenda. He or she is not trying to manipulate the parents. That comes later. :-)
I was talking to a friend whose baby is due in 2 months. I told her that what I had truly learned in the past 6 months is that no one technique works for every baby and that what works for my baby one day may not work for him the next. I also told her that it is easier for me to adapt to my son than for him to adapt to me. And that part is tough because he doesn't nap well. And I've left him to cry, thinking I would try that idea that Mom decides when the nap ends. Whatever. I don't want my son sleeping from exhaustion due to screaming his head off for an hour or more. That's not Baby Kind.
The irony here is that I am very much a control freak. And this book is too controlling for me. It's too much, and I think it expects too much out of an innocent, helpless baby who has no agenda or the ability to manipulate. And guess what? He's a really happy baby, laughing and talking and still sleeping 11 hours at night. I hope every night that it lasts, but I imagine that one night soon, he might wake up. And I'll go to him because I'll know he needs me.
All of this said, I only have the one child. A routine and schedule is more than likely more necessary if you have more than one child. So I can see why friends recommended it. But to expect this rigid routine from a baby whose nervous system is still maturing is just expecting too much. Let your baby be a baby, and enjoy him or her through every stage, no matter how trying.
Bottom line...this book expects too much of a baby. There is a lesser-known book called N.A.P.S. that got me through a trying period of short naps, and like I said earlier, The Happiest Baby on the Block got me through the early weeks due to the swaddling. I also really love the theory that Karp promotes of the 1st 3 months of life basically being the 4th trimester. I think that's what he calls it anyway.
So you see, 2 books helped me along the way,and I'm sure I'll read more as the need arises. Just be realistic if you buy this book and expect your baby to be a baby, not a miniature adult.
60 of 69 found the following review helpful:
This book was NOT for me Jul 06, 2009
By Lisa M. Keyser I read this book when my son was about 3 weeks old, and I was smitten by the easy prose and compelling evidence - a study done that put PDF (parent-directed feeding) against AP (attachment parenting). Our breastfeeding relationship was not developing well and I was a complete mess. The book seemed to offer so much common sense advice, and I certainly didn't want my child to be a needy, rambunctious brat. It seemed like if I went with AP instead of PDF, that's exactly what would happen.
In the ensuing weeks, I tried over and over again to put my son on the "flexible routine" put forth in Babywise. But I quickly realized that it would never work for us, and was just adding unneeded stress onto my life. I put it on the shelf and forgot about it until I came across some information on the internet about the history of Babywise. After reading through scores of testimonials involving malnourished babies, I thanked my lucky stars that I didn't push my son into the schedule. Listening to him cry for hours simply didn't work for me.
Through further research, I learned that I have a high-needs baby who needs (and loudly asks for) constant connection. It was hard for me to put aside all of the advice that I learned from Babywise - the use of props, nursing to sleep, feeding on cue, but I no longer felt guilty about responding to my child. Now at 4 months, my son is such a joy for me. I love coming home after work and nursing until he falls asleep. I love babbling and laughing with him as he takes breaks from nursing. And I love feeling 100% assured that by paying attention to my own instincts, I am doing the absolute best I can by my baby.
I could never, in good conscious, recommend this book to anyone because of the guilt I felt when I wasn't with the program, and because of the "all or nothing" attitude that is pervasive throughout the pages. Every child is different, and I'm sure that some thrive on this program, but mine did not and I'm glad I quit before it was too late.
116 of 139 found the following review helpful:
Do not listen to this advice! Feb 27, 2008
By Heidi Evensen
"Heidi"
I do not say this about many baby books, but this is one I would advice new mothers to steer clear of. This man does not have a medical degree, and the advice in his books is dangerous.
Letting a small baby cry himself/herself to sleep doesn't feel right, does it? I know of several mothers who have sat outside their baby's room crying, while the baby cries alone in the dark. Why do the mothers cry? Because something innate inside a mother urges her to respond to her baby's cries.
Sure, you can easily get a baby to sleep for 7-8 or even 12 hours a night. You can even teach a baby to never cry, simply by never responding to his or her signals. In many orphanages around the world, the babies are eerily quiet. There is little or no crying. Why is that? Because these babies have learned that their cries will not be heard, and have entered "survival mode," conserving energy by passively falling asleep or lying there quietly just waiting for someone to come and help.
Is that what you want for your child? How important is that good nights sleep to you? What is the cost of that sleep? Our babies are small for such a tiny part of our lives. Their basic challenge for the first two years (according to Erik Erikson and other developmental psychologists) is to learn to trust. Trust that mommy will come when he/she needs her.
Also, a thought about breastfeeding. I breastfed my son exclusively (with no solids) until 6 months of age. (This is the current recommendation of the WHO and the medical field as a whole.) I would never have had enough milk for him if it hadn't been for occasional cluster feedings. During times when my milk supply increased, it was necessary to sometimes feed him every hour or two for a few days, before the milk supply increased enough to go back to his usual 3-4 hours between feedings. And breastfeeding a 6-month old (without solids) with no night feedings? Forget it! Those feedings are necessary to keep the milk supply up. I know of several women who have had to introduce solids because their baby started sleeping through the night and their milk supply decreased.
My advice--enjoy your baby. Go with what your heart tells you. Your baby is tiny for such a short time...he won't keep waking up for years and years. Make the most of the time with your baby while he/she is little.
based on 640 reviews
Didn't work for us Sep 18, 2007
By Momof3!
Combined with commen sense, this is an amazing book! May 02, 2008
By Catherine Burns
Somewhat Helpful But Too Controlling Jun 06, 2008
By Susan B. Kohanek
"cook123"
